”The story of the violence that moved west with young America…and the story of a man who moved with it…”

Happy new year to everyone! And what better way to kick off the first review of 2004 than with a glance at “Pucket’s New Year,” an episode of Gunsmoke first broadcast over CBS Radio January 1, 1956.

Marshal Matt Dillon (William Conrad) and deputy Chester (Parley Baer) are thirty miles outside of Dodge City—they’ve had to seek shelter in a sod hut for the past two days due to one of the fiercest blizzards in recent memory. On their way back to Dodge, they investigate the remains of a camp when they are taken by surprise by a grizzled buffalo hunter wielding a rifle:

PUCKET: Git your hands up! Both of ya!
CHESTER: Wha…???
MATT: You’d better do what the old man says, Chester…
CHESTER: He was hidin’ in the wagon…
PUCKET: Come over here! Closer!
(SFX: footsteps, clinking of spurs)
MATT: This your camp, mister?
PUCKET: Of course it’s my camp…now you two drop them guns…
MATT: Ah, we’ve got our hands up…isn’t that enough?
PUCKET: You do what I say…I ain’t takin’ no chances…I ain’t gonna get left here again…you’re gonna hitch up that team and you’re gonna take me into Dodge…you ain’t runnin’ off like Jed Larner…
MATT: Who’s Jed Larner?
PUCKET: He’s my skinner…
MATT: Well, why did he leave you?
PUCKET: Well…he seen that blizzard comin’ and he didn’t wanna take any chances…so he rode off…he’s probably been in Dodge all the time, warm and cozy…
MATT: Why didn’t you go with him?
PUCKET: I twisted my leg and my foot so’s I can’t ride a horse, that’s way…Larner figured drivin’ a wagon be too slow…
MATT: You mean he left you here to freeze?
PUCKET: Yeah, and I’ll kill him when I find him…and I’ll kill you if you don’t drive me to Dodge…

Matt and Chester identify themselves to the old man, who goes by the handle of Ira Pucket. (The role of Pucket is played by actor Ralph Moody, an actor whose speciality was portraying eccentric and slightly off-center old cusses, as he did often on both this program and Dragnet.) Pucket complains that he has no feeling in his injured foot and once in Dodge, Doc (Howard McNear) has to amputate part of it to save the man’s life. The surgery leaves Pucket dependent on crutches and then a cane, and the old man is bitter because his buffalo hunting days are over. He’s also itching for vengeance against the man who left him out on the plains to die.

Matt is kicking back at the Long Branch, having a beer with Kitty (Georgia Ellis) when he spots a man at the bar who matches the description of Jed Larner (James Nusser):

KITTY: Well, this is a great way to start the new year, Matt…
MATT: What do you mean, Kitty?
KITTY: Well, all last year I was hopin’ maybe I’d be in San Francisco by now…
MATT: Oh? You never told me…
KITTY: What would you have done about it?
MATT: Ah…nothin’, I guess…uh…why San Francisco?
KITTY: No blizzards, no dust…no cowboys…
MATT: Yeah, but they got fog…and all those sailors and miners aren’t any gentler than these cowboys…
KITTY: Well, I know…but imagine…goin’ to dinner in a carriage…eatin’ off a tablecloth… dancin’ on a hardwood floor…
MATT (laughing) You’re spoiled, Kitty…
KITTY: Now how could I got spoiled? Here? In Dodge City? Ha ha…

(snip)

KITTY: What’s the matter, Matt?
MATT: That man at the bar…he just turned around…
KITTY: Which man?
MATT: The one with the scar down his cheek…I’ll be back, Kitty…
(SFX: footsteps and clinking of spurs)
LARNER: Good evenin’, Marshal…
MATT: Evenin’…
LARNER: What are you starin’ at me for?
MATT: Your name Jed Larner?
LARNER: And if it is…?
MATT: How long you been in town, Larner?
LARNER: About an hour…somethin’ wrong, Marshal?
MATT: You remember the big blizzard we had?
LARNER: Hmm…who don’t?
MATT: We all do, I guess…especially Ira Pucket…
LARNER: What?
MATT: He didn’t die, Larner…
LARNER: Well…that’s fine…I went back, lookin’ for him…I wondered where he got to…
MATT: Ah, sure you did…
LARNER: Well, it’s true!
MATT: Pucket’s here in Dodge, Larner…
LARNER: He is?
MATT: …and if he finds you, he’ll kill you…but he isn’t gonna find you because you’re leavin’…right now…and don’t show up around here again…
LARNER: Now wait, Marshal…
MATT: I can’t arrest you—I can’t put you in jail—but I’ll tell you what I can do…
LARNER: What?
MATT: Suppose I just let everybody here know that you’re the man who ran off and left Ira Pucket to die…
LARNER: No…
MATT: You know somethin’…they’d tear you apart, Larner…they’d set you on fire…

Larner takes the hint and—well, I hesitate to say this, but—gets the hell out of Dodge. But Pucket witnesses Larner’s departure and confronts Matt:

PUCKET: Why’d you do it, Marshal?
MATT: To save you from hanging…
PUCKET: Well, I rather hang than live this way…I wasn’t born to become a helpless old man…the least you coulda done was let me fight my own battle like I always did out on the plains…you took my manhood away from me, Marshal!
MATT: You’re livin’ in town now, Ira…among people…why don’t you get used to it?
PUCKET: All right…all right…all right, I will! I’ll live like you town people…
MATT: Fine…then why don’t you start by getting yourself a job?
PUCKET: I’m-a goin’ to…I sure am…and it’s gonna pay me a lot of money, too…
MATT: What do you mean by that?
PUCKET: You’ll find out, Marshal…when it’s too late…

Pucket’s job that will “pay him a lot of money” turns out to be an attempt to rob the bank in Dodge, which is quickly foiled when Chester takes off with the old man’s “getaway” horse-and-wagon and Matt stops him as he’s going out the front:

PUCKET: You think you outsmarted me, don’t ya?
MATT: Give it up, Pucket…you’re licked…
PUCKET: Yeah, well, I…oh…oh, I can’t shoot ya, Marshal…here…here, take the gun…eh, I’m nothin’ but a helpless old fool…can’t even rob a bank proper…
MATT: I’m not sure you really wanted to, Pucket…
PUCKET: What?
MATT: All you wanted was to prove something about that…manhood you think has been taken away from you…but you sure picked a foolish way to do it…
PUCKET: Yeah, I guess I did…
CHESTER: My goodness, I thought he wouldn’t never gonna give up, Mister Dillon…
MATT: He didn’t have much choice, Chester…
CHESTER: I went in the back way and told the people in the bank to keep out of the way…you want me to take him to jail?
PUCKET: Oh, no…no…no, I can’t stand jail…no, please, Marshal…
MATT: Lock him up, Chester…I’ll return this money and have a talk with Mr. Bodkin…

With all this talk about Pucket’s “manhood” you’d think it was more than just his foot that was amputated…fortunately for the addled old coot, Matt has managed to smooth things over and has even obtained for Pucket a manly, virile job—riding “messenger” on the town’s stage. Pucket brightens at this prospect, declaring “it’ll sure be a good way to start the new year.”

“Pucket’s New Year” was penned by writer John Meston, a former CBS Radio story editor who left his job to freelance writing Gunsmoke scripts beginning in the show’s second year. He would prove to be one of the best and most prolific of the series’ writers; his work described by star Conrad as “seasoned and highlighted by red streaks of magnificent violence.” The gritty realism of Meston’s scripts is what set Gunsmoke apart from its imitators; Meston wasn’t afraid to highlight how violent the West really was and he held the traditional radio western guitar-thumping hero in total disdain, writing in a letter to the New York Tribune: “I spit in his milk, and you’ll have to go elsewhere to find somebody to pour out the lead for his golden bullets.” When Gunsmoke made the eventual switch to television, Meston became the show’s head writer—proving to be the TV version’s greatest asset.

One thing I’ve always loved about Gunsmoke was its commercials for Chesterfield/L&M cigarettes—I’m not a smoker, but there's something about announcer George Walsh’s pitching for the product (“They satisfy…the most…”) that's enough to make me a three-pack-a-day man. One of the commercials on this broadcast is done by the one-and-only Jack Webb (Chesterfield also sponsored Dragnet at one time), who is curiously allowed to tout his NBC television series Dragnet on CBS Radio. I'm reminded of Fred Allen's observation that “NBC does not recognize Hell or the Columbia Broadcasting System,” so perhaps they had a more lenient policy over at the Eye.